Jimmy Wellington
The creator of The Fake news, comedy writer, gadfly. Everything here is original content (except for a few reblogs here and there)
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Many news outlets have some sort of Person on the Street section in which common people are asked to share their opinion about current events. In keeping with the current move towards journalistic laziness, The Fake News introduces a new segment that eliminates the need to leave the office. Every week we will ask a cross-section of society to tweet their opinion. Earlier this week, we asked for their thoughts on the debt ceiling crisis.
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Many news outlets have some sort of Person on the Street section in which common people are asked to share their opinion about current events. In keeping with the current move towards journalistic laziness, The Fake News introduces a new segment that eliminates the need to leave the office. Every week we will ask a cross-section of society to tweet their opinion. Earlier this week, we asked for their thoughts on the Fourth of July.
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Bloating? There’s an app for that.
It can be the most frightnening four words a man can ever hear: “I’m on my period.” This natural occurrence can unfortunately causes billions of women to behave for a few days in a manner which they would not normally behave. Many companies have tried to take advantage of this recurring occasion to make a buck or two, and Apple is the latest to throw their hat in the ring.
The Apple iPad provides all the protection of a regular Maxi pad, with a few added features to bring the product into the digital age. The starter kit includes a very small Bluetooth device, which attaches to the iPad, that sends a signal to other iPad wearers. In studies conducted by the company, women who are both wearing iPads are very likely to have their menstrual cycles occur at the same time through a proprietary process Apple calls “cyc sync.”
The company promises future features such as the ability to upload stats to Facebook and automatically friend your “cyc sync” contacts.
According to Apple spokeswoman Lisa March, “studies have shown that women who share their common struggle form a bond that helps each to improve their own condition. Women can share tips on medicine and other treatment options that make the time more bearable.”
