Jimmy Wellington
The creator of The Fake news, comedy writer, gadfly. Everything here is original content (except for a few reblogs here and there)
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That’s the spirit!
Not satisfied with their efforts to, as they put it, “teabag the whitehouse,” conservatives upset with President Barack Obama’s policies have devised a new strategy to garner media attention: donkey punching.
On April 15th, many people held “Tea Parties,” where they gathered, waved signs that made anyone associated with the English language cringe, and talked of teabagging. Some carried signs such as “Teabag the Liberal Dems Before They Teabag You!” Others planned on dumping large amounts of tea into bodies of water to replicate the Boston Tea Party and provide a little taste of home to any fish that had migrated from English waters and were missing a bit of the ole’ Earl Grey. Unfortunately, park police told the protestors that dumping tea in the water was not allowed. “Just another example of how the government regulators are keeping us down,” said protestor Harry Larrimore. “Imagine if our founding fathers had to deal with this level of regulation! They would have been stuck signing forms and getting permits instead of protesting.”
These teabagging parties received much coverage in the press, although much of it has been focused on the name they chose for their protesting activity. Apparently unbeknownst to the teabaggers, the name they chose to call themselves doubles as a reference to a sex act. Because of this, much of the media has lampooned their protests, and the teabaggers feel their message is not getting through. -
Would you have this man killed by amateurs?
Information has recently surfaced linking lobbying groups such as Freedom Works to sites that promote “grassroots” support for protestors seeking to “break up” town hall meetings about health care reform. Media outlets in the left, such as The Rachel Maddow Show on MSNBC, have been investigating connections between these seemingly spontaneous supports of anger and lobbying firms which appear to be funding them. Today, there was a new and surprising development in the investigation. Sources indictate that a lobbying firm, Totally Transparent and Honest Citizens for Change, has been producing radio and television advertisements describing health care reform as “a secret plot to kill old people,” as Maddow often desribes such scare tactics.
Political advertisements are often funded by special interest groups, so the discovery that TTHCC is producing these advertisements is not shocking, or even surprising. However, it is the special interest group that hired the firm that is the story. The firm was hired by the small yet powerful Serial Killers of the Elderly lobby.
“For months, we didn’t have an opinion on health care,” said a member who did not want to be identified. “We’re kind of a single interest voting block. Anything that doesn’t infringe upon our ability to kill people over the age of 65 is all right by us.”
